


Me and You and Her

by Ludovica



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bisexual Steve Rogers, Bisexuality, Coming Out, Complicated Relationships, M/M, poly in progress, ridiculous 40s slang
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-07
Updated: 2014-07-07
Packaged: 2018-02-07 22:20:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1916004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ludovica/pseuds/Ludovica
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky Barnes always knew that Steve Rogers would get on the straight and narrow at some point. Romantically speaking. He'd not have thought that giving Steve up for a dame would be this difficult. Yet he is determined to let Steve know that he's got his blessing.</p><p>The thing is, Steve doesn't want Bucky to give him up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Me and You and Her

**Author's Note:**

> I've tried to use a little 40s slang in this fic; if you want to look something up, please go here: nineteen40s.tumblr.com/slang

„So,“ Bucky started as he sat down on the cot in Captain America’s very own tent. Steve was sitting at his desk, the pencil he had been using to draw whatever when Bucky had entered still in his hand. Steve smiled at him – lord, it was distressing how much even his face had changed – not the important things, really, but… His head had always been so big for his body, his nose so long for his face, his eyes so large… And now everything just… He looked incredibly handsome, so unlike the little punk he had taken under his wing in Brooklyn, but like somebody you would rather expect to see on the silver screen than in an alleyway. (Apparently they had made movies about him. With him. Before Azzano. Before the factory.)

“That lady agent seemed to have the hots for you something bad, buddy. Can’t say you’ve not given her some googly eyes though.” He bit his tongue when he noticed how bitter he was sounding. Great way to start this conversation, really. But everything he had been saying lately had sounded bitter… Sometimes he still felt the soreness in his throat from… No, this wasn’t the time to think about that.

Steve frowned and stood up to turn the chair around, so he could look into Bucky’s face when he sat down again. He obviously tried to look relaxed, but even though he was nothing but perfectly in tune with his new hunk body on the battle field, he still seemed to have a few problems navigating it in private situations sometimes.

Dang, it was so strange having to look up to Steve’s face when they were both sitting.

“Well, Agent Carter is a very, very beautiful woman, and very courageous and… confident too. I mean, no fooling, I… don’t know if she’s got the hots for me, but…” He shrugged, and his voice turned lower. “I’ve liked her a lot since I met her at the training facility…”

Oh great. Bucky had been hardly out of the country when Steve had gotten to that training facility, as far as he had found out by now.

“Well, thanks for the dope. Guess I should take a powder now, huh?” He attempted to stand up, but Steve’s hand – not a lot bigger than it used to be, really, he had always had disproportionately large hands and feet – pushed down on his shoulder.

“Bucky, it’s not like I don’t… It’s just… I still…” He squared his jaw and frowned at himself, and suddenly he looked like the little guy Bucky had known, even though just for a second.

“No need to explain, Steve,” Bucky said, rubbing his hand through his hair. “I always knew that you’d one day ditch me for some dynamite dolly. Thought it was only a matter of time till one would see what I always saw in you. I didn’t exactly imagine that you’d turn into this sort of… dreamboat first, but hell, can’t know everything, huh?”

“But it’s not like that!” Wow, was that fear in Captain America’s voice? When Bucky looked at him with obvious confusion, Steve took his hand from his shoulder, but put it on his knee instead, before he looked down as if he was ashamed for something.

“Listen, Buck. What we have… or what we had, if you don’t want to continue… was always incredibly important for me. I’ve loved you since I’ve first seen you that day when we were 13. You should know that, Bucky. I’ve told you so many times.”

Bucky crossed his arms in front of his chest, defensively, and looked at the wall behind Steve, just so he’d not have to make eye contact with him. “Horny fifteen year olds say a lot of stuff for a hand job. I mean, I was at least as active duty as you were, I’d know.”

Steve looked up at him again, a frown on his face. “Can we stanch the bum rap? You know that you’re on the line there. I have never, ever lied to you about that, Bucky. I still love you. It’s just…” He groaned and rubbed his face.

“Honestly, Steve, I understand,” Bucky said, calmer now. As he had said – he had always known that this would happen at some point. “I understand why you’d rather get yourself a little honey instead of sticking around a stupid queer all your life. You should go and… see what’s cooking up between you and Pegs. I-“

“Please, Bucky, please shut up.” Steve looked at him as if he had just swallowed a whole bottle of cod liver oil. “It’s a lot more complicated than what you think. Peggy is a really swell lady, and I do feel… things for her. I can’t stop that. But, you know, my feelings for you also didn’t stop just because I’m not a pintsized punk anymore. It’s just that I’ve got those feelings for both of you. And I have no idea how I should deal with that – I don’t want to lose you, neither as a friend nor a lover, I need you too much for that, but… Whenever she looks at me, I feel like a million dollars. And whenever you look at me, I want to…” He blushed again, and shook his head. “Let’s just say, I’ve missed you a lot, in quite a few different ways.”

Bucky couldn’t help a little grin – and a little flush of blood to his own face neither, when he imagined Steve, well… ‘thinking’ of him. But this sudden emotional high didn’t last long. Steve didn’t really need him anymore, that was obvious. Who knew if those feeling he had weren’t just lingering memories? Even though… Oh lord, Bucky hoped that he was saying the truth.

“I just don’t know how to deal with those feelings.” Steve leaned back in his chair and sighed again. “I want Peggy, but I also want you… And it’s making me flip my wig when I let myself actually think about it… I just can’t… I couldn’t stand losing you again, Bucky.”

Suddenly he stood up, throwing down the chair in the process. Cursing, he picked it up again, before he looked down at Bucky. It was a strange feeling, being looked down at like that. Though Bucky wasn’t as sure if he minded this so much as he had been just minutes ago.

“Steve. Steve, cool down. Cool it.” He reached for Steve’s wrist and carefully grasped it. Lord, it was twice as thick as it had been – at least.

“Listen.” He sighed and rubbed his eyes. “I don’t want to lose you either. But… If you really fancy her, I don’t really want to keep you away from her either. And, I mean, I always tried to push you at every broad around, so if I go all wolf on you now that wouldn’t be genuine, would it?”

Steve raised his eyebrow, then he sighed again. “You don’t need to step aside just so I can be with Peggy, Buck.”

“I don’t plan to step aside.” Bucky leaned forward, bracing his elbows on his knees and looking up at Steve. “What I’m saying is that you should look how it works out with her – if you two actually mix well, so to speak. And then, if you’re sure that this could be turning into something more serious, you’ll tell her the same thing you told me. Maybe less desperate, but yeah, in general this. And then we’ll have a conversation like adults and see if there is any way this could work.” Of course it wouldn’t be easy to share Steve – and it would be horrible if this scenario would end with Steve choosing Peggy after all. But Bucky liked Peggy well enough, actually. The bitterness he had felt before when he thought Steve had chosen her over him had subsided a little, mainly because he really could not get enough of ‘I need you’ coming out of Steve’s mouth, no matter how much he tried to tell himself that it wasn’t true. Even if those words now came from Captain Fucking America, and not from the little punk he’d left behind at that exhibition back in the USA.

Steve looked at him for a few moments. Even despite his new bulk, Bucky still noticed every single tensing muscle, every movement of his fingers. He knew that he was contemplating his words intensely.

“Alright,” he finally said. “I’ll do that. As long as you really, really tell me if I hurt you with my behavior. And I will tell Peggy as soon as possible. It’d feel like betraying her if I didn’t.”

Bucky raised his eyebrows. “Just don’t go at it like a bull at a gate. Make sure you actually know that she wants something romantic – and maybe make sure that she’s not the type to snitch on other people either. That’s not exactly the news story I’d like to see…” He grimaced at the very thought of having his sexual preferences appear in every newspaper, on every radio program… ‘The queer who seduced Captain America to sin’ wasn’t exactly how he wanted to be remembered. Let alone that he didn’t want to go to jail for five years. He’d been captured once – that wasn’t an experience he was keen to repeat.

Bad thoughts. He really needed to stop thinking about this.

Up to now, he hadn’t really noticed that Steve was only wearing a shirt and pants at the moment. The shirt seemed to be a little tight, as if his arms would blow them at any moment.

“I just noticed that I haven’t yet had the pleasure to actually take a good look at that body…” Bucky ventured with a grin at Steve. Steve grinned back and sat down next to Bucky on the cot – making it creak slightly. He relaxed as soon as his body touched Bucky’s.

“Well, I might not be able to do something about my other problems right now, but that is something I can definitely remedy…” The grin still on his lips, he leaned in to Bucky. Bucky tilted his head back, closed his eyes, opened his lips-

Oh, yes, those were definitely the same lips he had been so addicted to back in New York.

**Author's Note:**

> I have originally posted this fanfic unedited for Steve's birthday over at my tumblr (http://frillyfacefins.tumblr.com) under the title 'We need to talk, Steve' (not gonna link it because unedited)


End file.
